Panic At Nabisco

If you're like me, and you like Sara Palin--you were a bit nervous before the debate last night.  You felt a bit like a parent who was watching their child's first sporting event; hoping Sara wouldn't fall down and draw attention to herself, or somehow become an object of scorn and ridicule.  Most of us saw enough of the Katie Couric interview to leave us with a bit of a queasy feeling in our bellies...we feared she would again stumble...maybe not know what to say...fumble and stumble over a word or two.

But Sara was facile.  She didn't have too much trouble speaking.  What she did have trouble with...was answering the questions asked of her.  At least three different times, she said "Well, I'd like to go back to the ____ (fill in blank according to whichever time) for a minute/if I could..."

She was very sweet and endearing, and I think--republicans & dems alike--were charmed by her folksy mannerisms and her ebullient smile..how could anyone not be?   I think good-hearted people appreciated the fact that this is a sweet lady with vulnerable insides, and not the steely, hard-hearted Xanthippe we've seen in the likes of Hillary Clinton and her ilk.

And yes--I know I'm not supposed to say it (tough!)--it's easy to be softened-up and a bit mushy by Ms. Palin's unusually beautiful face; and it's difficult not to notice how good she looks in a skirt when--curiously--we saw more camera-shots of the candidate's back-sides than we ever did when McCain debated Obama.  I felt as though the media must have hoped that all of the randy bloggers out there would focus too much on these things, hurting Sara's chances with the thousands of envious women and feminazis out there.  But if we're being honest and cutting through the bull-plop, many of us are enamored of Sara Palin's beauty.

But the feminazis and other liberals would love everyone to believe that Ms. Palin should be punished for her beauty and her sweetness.  If you listen to NPR at all, you'd hear pundits belittling her because of this (under a diaphanous veil, of course...)

Truthfully, just because guys like me who are brave enough to dare mention Sara's beauty (despite the certainty of being absolutely blasted by bitter, insecure little feminazis and other effete individuals) it's not even a factor in our support of her.  Even the silliest of dopey men realize that the run for the White House is not a frickin' beauty contest.

All of this out of the way, Sara definitely held her own.  Like she said, she's only been at this for five weeks.  She proved that--for a newbie--she's a force to be reckoned with.

From the fact that she--as Joe Biden himself confirmed--took on the oil companies in Alaska...not allowing them any tax windfalls...to our national security; Sara can "tinkle" with the big boys.  She's not about to cut & run out of Iraq, leaving the job undone so that it can be taken over by despots.  And just because it will take a decade for us to see any gasoline from offshore drilling doesn't mean that the price of gas won't stay down in the wake of its promise.  (Ask Chip about this one...)

Still, I wish Sara didn't exhibit so much fear.  She wasn't confident enough to answer some of Gwen Ifill's questions.  She was having her own debate, it seemed.  But I really would have liked to have heard her address some of the more pointed questions put out by the moderator.  This was the edge that Joe Biden clearly owned over Sara Palin.

Now, I am most definitely more closely aligned with the views and values of John McCain and Sara Palin, but I'm afraid that they're probably not going to make it into the White House because Barack Obama and Joe Biden are definitely better orators--which could also mean that they're adroit deceivers; depending on your perspective.  Personally, I think that Obama and Biden are especially skilled at saying exactly what the "sheeple" want to hear.

Joe Biden began the debate last night determined to be the opposite of what everyone expected; instead of the gaffe-lobbing, "over-passionate" (by his own nauseating description) jerky man, we saw a guy who looked as if he borrowed some allergy pills from Samantha Harris (King Richard's Faire commercial--way to emote, Sam...)

But when things got rolling, Mr. Biden came alive.  I can't help but wonder how much prevaricating was going on because I don't really trust him, but he had an undeniable charisma and trenchant delivery of his points.  Sara repeatedly relied on talking points and rhetoric.  Still, I believed Sara's overall message much more than I believed Joe Biden's.  I wish more people would stop trusting unctuous politicians and learn to detect speciousness and phony bull-plop.  Because clearly Sara Palin can't "out-debate" Joe Biden...but I think the "folksyness" (so many are panning) reflects an honest gal with nothing but the best of intentions.  Whereas with Joe Biden, you get the opposite side of that coin.

Therefore, I contend that Sara Palin won last night's debate. 

I have yet to hear anyone put things into their proper perspective regarding Barack Obama's use of the trite political phrase "You can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig!"

That's right, it most certainly is a trite political phrase.  Also correct is the fact that John McCain himself has used it.

But Sarah Palin made the very word "lipstick" famous with her line, "Do you know what's the difference between a 'hockey mom' and a Pit Bull? - Lipstick."  We've heard it reiterated over and over again, from every news program to entertainment magazine shows and more.  It was the line that made her famous, relatable, and a household name.

Perhaps Barack Obama's use of that trite political phrase was nothing more than an inadvertent little 'fender-bender.'  But let's face it; the audience reaction gave a much different account.  In fact, were it not for the unanimous paroxysm of laughter from Barack's servile little sheep, his disaffirmance would have a lot more verisimilitude.

But they did laugh; and it wasn't just some audible simper, either.  They absolutely cachinnated...like a person does when they've just been punched in the gut by hilarity.

So whether or not Barack Obama really meant to metamorphose a trite phrase into a neologism of convenience or not is most certainly up for debate.  Since I'm not the judgmental type, I'll yield to him the benefit of the doubt.

However, I consider the plausibility that he may have intended to bait John McCain.  Barack Obama is a very cunning political chessman.  It's quite possible that he knew the McCain camp would become rankled and demand an apology.  Then he could use his refusal to abjure for the self-righteous claptrap we've heard from him since, because this has been spun to leave some egg on John McCain's face; making him look like he's playing the "same old games" of past elections.

The most recent pols have Barack Obama slightly ahead of where he was at this same time yesterday.  ...Mighty convenient, Mr. Obama.

As a guy who cannot stand the very duplicitous Hillary Clinton, I feel like I'm going to bed with a masculine woman with "kankles" (and will surely regret it in the morning) by defending her.

But dammit, I've got to take a stand when I see b.s. being slung, and that's exactly what Barack Obama and subsequently John Edwards is guilty of doing with these shameless allegations that Hillary Clinton made an "inappropriate statement" when she said that "it took a president" (to bring the efforts of Dr. Martin Luther King to fruition...or something to that effect).

C'mon folks...we know what she meant, and to even suggest that it was somehow a "racist" or "disrespectful" comment is just foaming at the mouth.  If the shoe were on the other foot, and she was trying to impugn John McCain or Mitt Romney for saying such a thing, you bet I wouldn't be the only republican calling it crap.  Hopefully there are enough republicans out there who can pull the crayons out of their Pampers to have enough gumption to do the same...

These types of cheap shots are nothing but juvenile, and they have no place in politics, or in the realm of supposedly mature adults.  Grow up, guys.