Kim_Carrigan's Blog

You know, there is only so much a parent can do. We preach the dangers of having unprotected sex to our children (hopefully). We hope it sinks in. We are not with our children 24/7. We have no way of controlling what they do when they are not with us. Education is very important and should start at home. Talking about sex, self respect, respecting others and the possible consequences should all be part of the education. However, education is not always enough. When my kids were little I wouldn't let them ride their bike without wearing a helmet. I explained the dangers, showed them stories of kids getting injured, etc. When they rode off down the street, they took off their helmets. Teens are kids. They care more about what the other kids say than what their parents say. I'm not saying give out birth control in school. I mean kids can't even carry aspirin and they want to give out prescription meds without parental permission? Not right. I just wanted to make the point that education isn't always enough.

Kids today know more about having sex at such an early age then we’re willing to give them credit for. They know all about having sex long before we can sit them down and explain to them about the consequences. The problem is they’re not responsible enough to have kids no matter how many times we tell them this. Unfortunately in their little heads they think they are. In today’s day and age it’s almost an impossible task to get that point across to some of these kids. You just have to keep your fingers crossed and hope to God they’ve listened to you and make the right decision.

All the education in the world isn’t going to help any of these kids if THEIR not willing to make the right decision and take the right precautions. These kids today are smart enough to do it, it’s just a question of whether their willing to do it.

June,

I think these young girls listen too much to their boyfriends telling them "don't worry I'm not going to get you pregnant, it’s going to be o.k." and then, oops, too late. This is the time for the girl to listen to that little voice inside and say "I believe you, but, let’s use protection anyway". I know it's a tough decision for them to make, but, it's something THEY both have to do. They have to forget that "It can't happen to me" mentality and do the right thing.

It's hard to believe that anyone not just high school kids would have unprotected sex with like you said "the number of diseases out there, including the Numero Uno...AIDS"...

I like when the boys say "it won't happen the first time". That's what parents have to teach their kids. That they can't listen to the boys and girls who have "experience". They have to listen to the adults. Read books. Too many lives are affected. I have boys and they were all taught what the consequences are. So far so good but who knows what will happen? At least they're all in their twenties now. It's a little different.

I don't know guys, but....when I was a teen (10-12 years ago), I was more afraid of what my parents would do to me than what any boy would think. Now, let me clarify, my parents were not violent people. They never went beyond the usual swat on the rear end, but I knew my punishment would just not be worth whatever I was being talked into doing. Not to mention that I knew my parents well. I knew if I got 'in trouble', I was on my own for sure! No ifs, ands or buts about that. My mother was not going to be raising any child of mine. I was going to have to be QUICK about figuring that one out. I KNEW this. I'm 27, married, stable job and stable home and I'm STILL holding out a little longer. The responsibility is HUGE! My mother drove that home.

June , you have enough on your hands with those two in the picture. By the way, How is the house hunting going? With todays report, you should have the pick of what ever you want.

There's a nice 2 bedroom in my building for 450 thousand. Should I put you down for 2?

fenwaydav,

It is the standard of practice to react, with evaluation for hospitalization, to homicidality and/or suicidality. However, the folks who are doing this "counseling" are not licensed to do it!!! They are guidance counselors, trained in a different specialty, and licensed to perform different duties. It's alot like having your electrician install the plumbing in yur new house....you might end up, as Curley Howard so aptly put it: "Hey Moe, no wonder this plumbin' don't work....there's WIRES in it!!"

But let's look at more mundane counseling issues. Let's say a child is having problems with a parent's authority. That child goes to the guidance counselor to chat. By what he is told, he ascertains the parent is too strict...getting the point? Here's the sure fire way to begin down the road to teen pregnancy...our original subject.

Good intentions alone are insufficient, fenwaydav. What is the ONLY acceptable route is good intentions, melded with some degree of technology (a theory based at least loosely in science), the outcome of which is tested for significance.

The other thing we have to address is the whole social welfare root cause of this, and many other of our prevalent problems. Our well intentioned, yet hopelessly flawed social welfare policy has stripped from our culture the natural consequences of behavior. Until we allow consequences (read that...the natural result) of behavior to be experienced, why would we expect behavior to change?

The dessemination of BC just amkes it all worse in the long run, while trying to stop the consequence of behavior in the short run. When I grew up (in the Dark Ages), there was an old saying boys used to say: "When yu make the deposit, you have to be willing to accept the delivery." We understood and changed out behavior to conform with our desire not to suffer the consequence.

Let me ask you all this: If a teenager does not have the impulse control to deny themselves sexual gratification, what are the odds they will have the impulse control to effectively use birth control?

The answer t this question is hidden in the facts of the Gloucester story...17 teen pregnancies in a school WITH the clinic on site....remember, the hospital made them STOP...