Mark_Ockerbloom's Blog

It is always important to be truthful about important things. On small things, however, when you don't want to hurt someone's feelings unnecessarily, then TACT is important.
There are ways of saying things to people that are honest, but also done in a way that is respectful or tactful.

Honesty is not a genetic trait. Children learning to be honest is one of the lessons they learn in good families taught by good parents. It begins with honesty modelled by parents, and is fostered by parents rewarding children when they tell the truth in the most difficult situations.

It is about the simplest and most profound lessons taught by parents to their children. It is our solemn obligation.

When you lie once then you have to lie again to justify the last lie and that becomes a snow ball...
While parents "have to say" a white lie for ex. to marketing people on the phone, they have to think what they say to that person when kids are present. We all get phone calls like that all the time and we should be pros by now on what is best to say especially when kids are listening.
Children always copy their parents first, then friends, teachers etc. We should be good examples and teach honesty for life.
Although you follow that rule kids are always tempted to tell a lie. Lies come out eventually and when they do the attitude is important: how the parent explains what's right to do. Using the right words is crucial! But my question is how can you stop continuous lying even if you say it's not a good thing, especially teens 16-18 yrs old lying straight to your face...
Does Suzin Bartley have an answer to this kind of situation?

LK34, And Weapons of Mass Destruction? But this is a whole other blog for anther day.....

In response to legendkiller's remark about Bush:

What is it called? Its called the truth! When we 'dethroned' Saddam and his government successfully, we DID accomplish our mission, so there was no lie when he said that.

What ensued cannot be factored into it; we became engaged in another whole "war".

I suggest you use your own logic, legendkiller34, rather than parroting what leftists like to spew to support their Bush-hating agenda.

People get so use to lieing, that they feel the need to make up some story to get out of a social engagement.

We do have "white lies" and they are generally acceptable in our society. They serve to protect the feelings of someone other than ourselves.

When being invited to a social engagement, we have no obligation to give a reason. But, this is where the 'white lie' comes in handy. Rather than saying, "No, I don't want to go to your party...I hate your parties!", we end up saying things like, "I'm sorry, I can't make it on that date." It may be a lie, but doesn't insult the party-giver. And, you don't need to make up some fanciful story which may come back to bite you if you do.

So there are different degrees of lieing; some help in a situation, and some don't. Its how often and to what degree a person lies that determines part of your character.

Anyone claiming they've never told an "untruth" is basically....Lieing! LOL

I think we're being too hard on the kids and not taking that honest look at ourselves. While my kids are far from perfect (me, too) - one thing I never have to worry about is that one or another of my children will ever lie to me. Of this I am certain. Twenty-one years as a mom, I've ALWAYS told my children the truth. ALWAYS -- even when it wasn't pleasant -- or if the subject was too mature, I'd shape the truth to be age-appropriate and help them to understand that things are not always pretty or the way we want them, that there are times when Life's unpleasant/goes awry and, on those occasions, I'd SHOW them how I handle a problem -- NEVER lying, not once. In return, if may take a day or two, but my kids always come to me with whatever it is (they're in trouble/a friend is in trouble) because they have NO FEAR of recriminations. I NEVER punish my kids. I thank them from the bottom of my heart for trusting me with whatever it is that's bothering them -- and then I show them how I'd correct the problem. It's my job to teach them to be good and moral people. It's not my job to punish them for getting into mischief, rather to help them learn to prevent and correct problems, forthrightly, so that the problem doesn't come back to "haunt" them later. While we've made our share of mistakes, my heart is always content knowing that my kids trust me completely -- and I can trust them completely in return -- every time.