Nick_Dussault's Blog

Okay so I’m 0-for-1 so far. I guess I thought everyone in America would love to see what would happen if a male stripper actually was a contender on American Idol. Sorry Dime-A-Dance, looks like it’s back to the “Thong Song” for you.

Did you get a look at the rock Kat McPhee was wearing? Where did her husband/aspiring actor/manager get the cash for that thing? She must be raking in some big bucks if his ten percent bought that bauble. Of course it doesn’t look like she’s eaten since the show ended so maybe they put their weekly allotment of Whole Foods money into the ring. Let’s hope they didn’t buy it on credit banking on her hitting it big. The noise that came out of her sounded more like a tribute to the screechy musings of Yoko Ono than anything resembling a Beatles song.

But that was last week. This week, our fave top 11 proved that lightning doesn’t strike twice with another foray into the music of the Beatles. Even Simon said it probably wasn’t such a good idea after listening to the largest collection of mediocre performances in the show’s history. They all pretty much sucked.

 

 

Hog riding nurse Amanda Overmyer promised to “tease it up real high and throw some black eyeliner on” “Back in the U.S.S.R.” It had its good moments but I felt like she was maybe a half step above the band the entire time. She had fun, the crowd roared and Randy and Paula blabbed on about it being good but not great. Simon  called it “predictable, a bit of a mess in parts” and encouraged her to do something different otherwise she risks becoming “a little boring.” He’s sort of right. I hope she lasts ‘til Mimi week…that will be amazing. This girl loves to perform – then again so does Mimi. They’re so going to be bffs.

Kristy Lee Cook told Simon she “can blow you out of your socks”. Unfortunately, Simon’s not voting so she should probably just concentrate on singing well. Her “You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away” was so dull that the hot chick factor might not be enough to save her this week. Unless of course Simon intervenes.

David Archuletta continues to make me uncomfortable. His reaction to forgetting lyrics in front of 30 million people last week was “dang it.” This week he sang a very Andrew Lloyd Weber-like rendition of “The Long and Winding Road.” The judges loved it. Sounding like she’s taken one too many sips from the big red cup, Paula blathered on about his purity, his character, blah, blah, blah. Simon called it “master class.” I found it very Broadway touring company. Am I the only one who thinks he might be one dimensional? And would you really pay to see him do his “Community Auditions” schtick in an arena?

Michael Johns was up next and his most memorable moment to date was performing “Bohemian Rhapsody” during Hollywood week. That is about as good as its gotten for the aspiring Aussie rocker. He tried to put everything good about “A Day in the Life” into 90 seconds and he failed miserably. Paula tried to save him by saying how hard it is to learn to perform with the earpiece. Seacrest pointed out he wasn’t wearing one and the ex-Laker Girl changed her tune. “There’s no excuse.” It doesn’t happen often, but this time she’s right. I think this guy’s running out of chances.

Could somebody get Brooke White a stylist? When you start looking like the love child of Paris Hilton and Big Bird, it’s time to seek professional help. And of course the saffron clad cutie sang “Here Comes the Sun.” Nobody really liked it. Simon confessed that he “just knew when you were choosing that song you’d be dressed in yellow.” Didn’t we all? Everyone has an off night, let’s hope this was hers. She’s still amazing, just not infallible.

David Cook didn’t exactly wow anybody tonight with his “Day Tripper.” What’s up with that Peter Frampton voice box thing? It felt so Blake Lewis to me. Again, I think he’s great though I have friends who think he’s way too cocky. I have to admit showing his fist with at the top of the show was a bit rocker wannabe. Dude, I know Chris Daughtry came from this show, but so did Clay Aiken so stop trying so hard. No need to rock our world, just sing, dammit.  

Carly Smithson chimed in next with a sweet, tender version of “Blackbird” that Simon hated. Considering what we’ve seen so far, I kind of like it. But the girl needs to hook up with Brooke and get a stylist. Did you see that hideous shirt? And the 7 tattoo on her finger? Please, please, please stop showing her tattoo-faced husband. I think the face should be an ink-free zone – at least on “American Idol.”

This week Jason Castro found out “my bell” was French as he prepared for a rendition of “Michelle” that would make any girl named Michelle change her name. Fortunately, as Cowell pointed out, this is a television show and he’s got this goofy charm that makes people like him. He’s starting to resemble John Travolta in that Scientology movie but he’s still so likable that you can’t help but root for him.

At this point in the show I couldn’t remember the names of the remaining contestants and Syesha Mercado quickly reminded me why. Her “Yesterday” made me yearn for tomorrow when I could hopefully forget about this whole Beatles part deux experience (that’s French, Jason). It was boring. I couldn’t wait for it to end because it meant we would be that much closer to FOX25 News at 10.

But first we had to listen to Chikezie. I'll always hate him for having one name but this week he gave me another reason why I want him back in the baggage business at LAX. I’ve always thought “I’ve Just Seen a Face” was a really fun, perky little Beatles’ tune…until now. He tried to Lutherize the first half, which was abysmal. Then he played the harmonica (atrociously as Simon noted) as a transition to an up-tempo ending that felt like a hillbilly hoedown gone awry. One name deserves two words after this…good-bye. Unfortunately it won’t happen yet. But one can dream.

Speaking of dreams, I could barely stay awake for Ramile Malubay’s “I Shoulda Known Better.” Simon’s remark that “it sounded like Chikezie was on harmonica” was indeed the high point of this show. And finally, it was over.

 

Bottom three:

            Chikezie

            Kathy Lee Cook

            Amanda Overmyer

Say good night, Kathy Lee Cook. You’ll never get the chance to blow Simon out of his socks.